The Hundredth Monkey

Knife Pleat Tutorial

2009-02-27T16:56:00.000-08:00

This video is an online companion to the pattern given out at the Knitmore Girls' Meet and Greet at Stitches West. Enjoy!

"She was angel-like, when she swam in the river at night"

2009-02-10T15:08:00.000-08:00

Yay! New pattern!

Thanks to the generosity of Miss Jasmin, my yarn patron, I am pleased to bring you "Windfall," currently available over on Ravelry.
Entrelac on steroids, it measures 46" x 46" and knits up quickly.

buy now

"I'm not the man they think I am at home, oh no, no, no, I'm a rocket man, a rocket man buring at his fuse up here alone"

2009-01-29T12:13:00.001-08:00

I totally made yarn! And it was fun! I foresee a new fiber addiction coming my way...

Thanks to Miss Jasmin, who lent me her Victoria.

I don't know the color of the roving, but I know it's Crown Mountain.

I've got a job interview today; wish me luck!

"Smells like nothing, back to Beatnik"

2009-01-05T18:00:00.000-08:00

I'm about to share the Dydo secret to awesome fringe; you may want to lay down.

Step one: Cut a piece of cardboard, half the height you want your finished fringe.

Step two: Slice a notch in both ends to act as an anchor, kind of like a giant bobbin.

Step three: Slip your yarn end into one notch.

Step four: Wind your yarn completely around the cardboard as many times as you need. For my Montego Bay Scarf, I wrapped that particular piece of cardboard 200 times. I used a sharpie to keep track of how many wraps I had done, marking every 50 wraps, 'cuz I just don't trust my brain to keep track.

Step five: Set this aside until you're ready to attach the fringe.

Step six: Cut along the bottom of the cardboard, releasing all those wraps to their full size fringe glory.

Step seven: Fringe away.

"Oh the weather outside is frightful"

2008-12-12T09:06:00.000-08:00

Attack of the Christmas meme!

1. What is your favorite Christmas carol/song? Sacred - O Holy Night, Secular - Silver Bells
2. White lights or multicolored? Multis, but I prefer those cool old bubble lights
3. Do you you have a cut tree, live tree or an artificial tree? Artificial, yet the cats still want to eat it.
4. Eggnog, mulled cider, or hot chocolate? I make awesome Mexican style hot chocolate. I lurves it.
6. Do you write a Christmas letter? Nope.
7. Do you like receiving Christmas letters/photos? Sure!
8. What is your favorite Christmas story/movie? Showgirls. Dude, it's totally a Christmas movie. Christmas is going on in the background the whole movie and no one mentions it. There's even muzak carols playing.
9. Have you ever made a gingerbread house? No, but I would like to. Anyone have a recipe for wheat free gingerbread?
10. Poinsettias or holly? I like the simplicity of Holly.
11. Do you display a nativity scene? No. The baby Jesus lives in my heart.
12. Do you bake Christmas cookies? No, but I make marshmallows!
13. Ham or turkey? "Bacon tastes good. Pork chops taste good." I loves me some ham.
14. In what languages can you wish someone a Merry Christmas (without cheating)? English, Spanish, and German.
15. Do you know all the words to Jingle Bells? I know verses 1, 2, and 4. Verse 3 is kinda self deprecating.
16. Do you put presents under the tree? Definitely
17. How do you eat a candy cane? I start at the straight end.
18. What is your biggest holidays pet peeve? Not enough public caroling!
19. What is your favorite Christmas tradition? Stockings. Santa does awesome stockings at the Dydo house.
20. What was the best present you ever got for Christmas? Hmm, when I was little, Santa brought me the perfect cabbage patch doll. That was pretty damn good. Yes, I was a child of the eighties. But the best present I ever got was the day off when I was working in a restaurant that was open on the holidays.
21. Do you open gifts Christmas Eve of Christmas Day? When I was a kid, I got to open 3 on Christmas eve, but now I save them all for Christmas day.

"You say it's your birthday, duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh, it's my Birthday, too"

2008-12-06T00:01:00.000-08:00

Though not a huge milestone birthday, I am turning 31 today. Also, happy Birthday Miss Tika!

I thought I'd celebrate with a little slide show of Chloe through the ages:

If you'd like to get me something, send me a saucy e-card, or buy one of my patterns.

"Lovely Rita, meter maid, nothing can come between us, when it gets dark I tow your heart away."

2008-11-30T20:44:00.000-08:00

Mesmer has gone live! The pattern in now available at Etsy and on Ravelry. These socks are so fun to knit, they practically create themselves.

- Beatles Lyrics

"He robbed from the rich and he gave to the poor, stood up to the man and gave him what for."

2008-11-25T14:29:00.000-08:00

I heart Warren Sapp. It must be declared, here and now. I love the chemistry between him and Kim Johnson on Dancing with the Stars; I hope they win tonight!

In knitting news...
May I present "Mesmer," my newest pattern, coming out this week. I got inspired watching Alan Rickman sensually emote all over my teevee in the 1994 flick of the same name (thank you netflix, you are my shinning Knight). This sock pattern features whirling cables around the leg, which gracefully move across the instep. The cables wind in opposite directions on each sock, so it has a built in anti-second sock syndrome device! Gauge is 31 stitches and 44 rows over 4” in stockinette stitch on US size 1/2.25 mm needles. I used one entire skein of Colinette's Jiiterbug in Vatican Pie. I've got size 7 1/2 feet, so if your feet are bigger, pick up two skeins, or a different sock yarn. There are loads of sales going on this week at almost all the local yarn shops. So stock up with this pattern in mind! If you're planning on making more holiday presents, these socks took me about 4 days.

"Come on feel the noise. Girls, rock your boys."

2008-11-10T01:15:00.000-08:00

It's no surprise I love making hats with ears. Well, I've decided to share my method. I've created an excel spreadsheet to help you with the necessary calculations for your own "Open Source Kitty Hat." Included in the spreadsheet are some tips on fit and style and a thorough explanation of the three needle bind off.

Get it here

If you like it, I'd appreciate it if you'd throw some pennies my way to help with the costs. Donate via the paypal button on the right.

Now show me your Kitty Hats!!!!

- Quiet riot Lyrics

"Well, I talk about it, Talk about it Talk about it Talk about it"

2008-11-09T14:08:00.000-08:00

For all you Ravelers out there, check it:

Ten of my patterns are now available for download on Ravelry, including a few freebies!

For those knitters who aren't on Ravelry, you need to get on it. It is so much fun! It's really neat to be able to see, pretty much instantly, what other crafters have done with a pattern, or how they've modified it to fit better. Sure, there's a waiting list, but invites are going out much faster these days.
Take the screen shot tour.

- Soundtrack Artists Lyrics

"got up this morning on the right side of my bed, with all these crazy thoughts screaming through my head"

2008-11-05T11:08:00.001-08:00

My face hurts from smiling so much last night. I have a Hope hangover.

Sailor Moon Lyrics

"Must separate the church and skate!"

2008-11-05T10:07:00.000-08:00

Why stop at banning Gay Marriage? Let's vote how the old testament tells us. I think we need a amendment to our constitution to ban the eating of shell fish:

Leviticus 11 says:
9 These shall ye eat of all that are in the waters: whatsoever hath fins and scales in the waters, in the seas, and in the rivers, them shall ye eat.
10 And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:
11 They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcasses in abomination.
12 Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you.

and while we're at it, let's enforce sacrifices of our purest male cattle:

Leviticus 1 says:

2: Speak unto the children of Israel, and say unto them, If any man of you bring an offering unto the LORD, ye shall bring your offering of the cattle, even of the herd, and of the flock.
3: If his offering be a burnt sacrifice of the herd, let him offer a male without blemish: he shall offer it of his own voluntary will at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation before the LORD.

and who couldn't get behind banning wool mixed with linen (I'm looking at you Louet!) and bowl cuts, (sorry Beatles you're all burning in hell!):

Leviticus 19 says:

19: Ye shall keep my statutes. Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind: thou shalt not sow thy field with mingled seed: neither shall a garment mingled of linen and woolen come upon thee.

27: Ye shall not round the corners of your heads, neither shalt thou mar the corners of thy beard.

and once and for all, (right next to the text that says gay marriage should be legislated) let's make adultery a punishable crime and stop those heinous offerings to Molech!

Leviticus 18 says:

20: Moreover thou shalt not lie carnally with thy neighbor's wife, to defile thyself with her.
21: And thou shalt not let any of thy seed pass through the fire to Molech, neither shalt thou profane the name of thy God: I am the LORD.
22: Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.

52% of California, you disappoint me.

- NOFX Lyrics

"A heart full of love, no fear, no regret" "My name is Marius Pontmercy" "And mine's Cosestte"

2008-11-03T14:37:00.000-08:00

Farewell, Purlescence.

I bid farewell and best wishes to Purlescence Yarns as I move on into new ventures.

http://purlescence.typepad.com/purlescence/2008/11/farewell-chloe.html

- Les Miserables Lyrics

"Can you help me occupy my brain?"

2008-10-31T09:26:00.000-07:00

Happy Halloween!

Halloween has always been my favorite holiday. (I know, no surprise there.) I love it so much I wanted a Halloween Wedding. Happy Anniversary, Baby!

- Ozzy Osbourne Lyrics

"The Zombies were having fun, the party had just begun..."

2008-10-23T00:59:00.000-07:00

I've got a new pattern for sale! May I present, "Cranio":

Perfect for Halloween, or if you're like me, anytime of year! I wore mine out to Karaoke tonight and it was a big hit. Of course, I had to announce, once I got the mic, that "I made my hat" before I sang "Baby One More Time."

If you'd like to buy it, kindly click the paypal button and I'll email you the .pdf.
Or you can buy it and download it at Ravelry!

I created this as a commission for a friend and I was so excited about it, I made myself one. And you know I'll be rockin' it all year long! I think I'm going to make another one, but embellish it with sequins, beads, and embroidery floss so it's more like a calavera for Dia de los Muertos.

- Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band Lyrics

"Am I scaring you tonight? Your mind is in Disturbia. Ain't used to what you like."

2008-10-14T16:36:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry mom and Audie; I like Susan Lucci.

I made the classic mistake of confusing an actor with their character. I watched Susan Lucci portray the heinous Erica Kane Martin Brent Cudahy Chandler Roy Roy Montgomery Montgomery Chandler Marick Marick Montgomery for years and I pretty much wrote her off, laughing every time she lost the daytime emmy.

But I have been completely enchanted with her on Dancing with the Stars. She's been kicking ass and turning out great dances week after week. I'm loving her!

Also, I'm totally in love with Lance & Lacey and Warren & Kym. Anybody else out there watching?

- Rihanna Lyrics

"From my heart and from my hand, why don't people understand my intentions?"

2008-10-05T12:44:00.000-07:00

"IT'S ALIVE!!!!!"

Hi Peeps!

"Hey, Chloe! How do you feel?"

"I feel GOOD, oh, I feel so Good, uh!"

Seriously, yo.

It's about 7 weeks after my surgery and I feel like my old self again. There's been no pain, no vicodin for several weeks now. Heck, I haven't even had to take Advil. I'm exercising, getting lots of stuff done around the house, and helping my parents move into their new home. (My mom finally owns! I'm so proud of her. Plus, the house is TOO freakin' cute.)

On the knitting front, I'm trying to get done all my lingering projects. I think I'm going to reassess things I no longer really have an interest in knitting and rip 'em out. The ones I still totally love I'm gonna buckle down and finish.

Or maybe I should just toss everything and start fresh? Cleaning out my mom's house (rented for 30 years) has given me a new perspective on the amount of stuff I personally own.

- Oingo Boingo Lyrics

"I want something good to die for"

2008-09-04T14:44:00.001-07:00

Okay, this is not a political blog, but I am so freaking tired of all this sexism hypocrisy the republican pundits are spewing forth. Watch this clip from The Daily Show:

http://jezebel.com/5045480/the-daily-show-calls-out-republicans-sudden-interest-in-sexism

grumble.

- Queens of The Stone Age Lyrics

"There you go, loookin' pitiful, just because I let you go."

2008-09-01T04:18:00.000-07:00

I want to say a big thanks to everyone who's read the whole Harry Potter series and didn't spoil it for me. As part of my convalescence entertainment, I read books 2-7. I just finished Deathly Hallows and, oh my god, I was so weepy for the last 100 pages. Wow. It was really well done! Yay, that one of my life goals down...now onto conquering the Ukulele! (I've already learned to play "Amazing Grace", Hey-ya," and "Wish you were here")

Thanks again for all the love! I'm progressing along just fine. Still tired, still sore, but I'm thoroughly resting; I'm in no hurry to injure myself!

- Pink Lyrics

"The center of attention, even when they're up against the wall"

2008-08-25T16:38:00.000-07:00

HI peeps!

I wanted to pop on here and let everyone know that I am doing quite well. I'm getting lots of good rest, taking it easy for all of us sinners.

I really appreciate all the thoughts, prayers, and get well wishes. It really means a lot for me to open up my inbox and read your warm fuzzies!

And check out this nifty little gadget I just found:

- Britney Spears Lyrics

Now you'll know where the blog titles come from.

"From all the unborn chicken voices in my head..."

2008-08-20T17:40:00.001-07:00

Yup - Eddie is guest blogging. We felt this would be the best way to inform all of you internet types in one swoop from this fella. I'll be updating you kids while she's incapacitated. This is the part where you say "Uh-oh."

Over the last two days, we've been overwhelmed with phone calls and text messages and emails and Gatorade (Chloe's not eating solids yet). I'd love to call each and every one of you back, but after repeating the same thing enough times to make a baker happy with his dozen, I thought I'd hit you all at once.

This, of course, doesn't mean we love you any less... it just means we've a lot on the table right now. By broadcasting over this virtual PA you will hopefully get all the answers, and I won't need to get laryngitis from saying it so often! ;)

So here's the summary
The surgery went smoothly. There were no complications, according to Dr. Nezhat. We get a full description and breakdown as soon as Chloe is well enough for the follow up visit.

In the meantime here is what we do know:

Chloe is doing great. She's home and should be ready for visitors by the weekend.
She is heavily medicated and bedridden - hold off on the calls for a couple more days. (Text messages are great! She can reply at her leisure).
The nurses and docs were pretty impressed to see her walking around the halls that afternoon. My Chloe is one tough bitch.
"The scarring and adhesions were severe and extensive." Nezhat repeated and reiterated "severe" enough to temp me to buy him a thesaurus.
There were no unexpected illnesses or cancer.
I mistook the first time he said "adhesion" for "infection" - this is incorrect info and sorry to those i've already passed it along to.
The remaining half ovary on her left side, as well as the right fallopian tube were removed. (Her left tube was removed in the previous surgery).
We'll still be able to have kids, but the need for help is now certain in that matter.
She is out of commision for 4 days to 8 weeks - this has not yet been defined but will be determined by how well she does.
It'll be 2 weeks before she'll be able to drive again.
We are in good spirits, and are accepting good spirits as gifts. She's a Jack fan and I like white russians. ;)
I won't post our mailing address or phone #'s, but comment that you'd like them and I'll cut and paste an email to you.
Post your comments here and Chloe will read them!
If your question wasn't answered here, please ask.

She'll be back in action soon enough. Thanks again for all the well wishes - We'll both try to get back to your calls as soon as we regain our ball bearings.

I snapped a pic of Chloe in pre-op.

"sometimes I don't speak right, but yet I know what I'm talking about."

2008-08-14T15:58:00.001-07:00

"He's a good man, and thorough" (name that movie!)

Today was my pre-op with Dr. Nezhat and his assistant surgeons. I was very pleased with my meeting. Everyone in his office took the time to explain exactly what was going to happen, including "what if" scenarios. Never did I feel like crying, like I had in my two previous per-ops. I felt really happy and optimistic, excited even. There's a very unlikely chance they'll remove both ovaries (only to save my life) and pretty much no chance they'll remove my uterus. Likely, the surgery is gonna be a very thorough clean up of scar tissue. They're going to check a good chunk of my abdomen (stomach, liver, uterus, intestines, etc.) for adhesions and remove them.

When I went over to Stanford for my meeting with the anesthesiologist, I got the same excellent care I'd received earlier. Everyone was really friendly and answered all my questions. They took my motion sickness (which can lead to complications with the anesthesia) very seriously, and they were sweet, too!

My surgery is set for 7:30 am; I gotta be there at 5:30 am. Expected surgery time is 2 hours, but 3 hours are blocked for it. After that, it's about an hour in recovery, then a stay in the "23 hour" ward. I'll be at Stanford overnight, maybe longer if I need it. My recuperation after the surgery can be anywhere from 4 days - 8 weeks, but they expect me to take about 3. Dr. Nezhat's office will be calling everyday the week after my surgery and checking on me.

I feel really good about this.

"Happy talking, talking happy talk, talk about things you like to do"

2008-08-14T12:36:00.001-07:00

My surgeon's got a page in wikipedia.

Aw yeah.

My pre-op is tomorrow! An interesting note on that, though... The interwebs has been blowing up today about the discovery of a supposed Sasquatch body. There is going to be a press conference held 4.4 miles away from my doctor's office to present DNA and photo evidence. Do you think there's going to be traffic? Should I call ahead and warn them about possible lateness due to Bigfoot shenanigans?

"Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know, know, know"

2008-07-29T11:05:00.000-07:00

Hiii Everybody!

These last few months have been a terrific learning experience. Mainly, learning all about my cats and what they do during the day.

I've got a date! If you'll notice the handy little countdown widget in my sidebar--->
Surgery is going to be August 19, 2008 with my pre-op meeting the Friday before. I'll have more details once I have my pre-op, but basically, this is another laproscopy to clean up all the scar tissue from my Endometriosis. There's a possibility the surgery will be in-patient and I'll be in the hospital for a couple days. I'd love vistors!

"I just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in"

2008-06-25T14:03:00.000-07:00

Check it, yo:

Aw yeah.

You know I'll be there!

And speaking of my condition:
I recently found out that my lady bits problems are genetic. My Aunt M and my Great Aunt B both had complications from endometriosis. It's comforting, in a way, to know that this was something left to me by the genetic lottery and totally of out my hands. The part that worries me, though, is that my Aunts had one baby each, with great difficulty, before they were my age. It's been thirty years since my Aunt had her treatment and there have been huge leaps in treating this ailment, but I still worry.

My pain is currently up and down; it's definitely down since I had the Lupron shot (just Advil for me!) I really just want to get back on with my life.

"And don'tcha feel all warm and cozy, Watching people out in the rain! That's...Schadenfreude! People taking pleasure in your pain!"

2008-06-10T12:58:00.000-07:00

OH, sweet Schadenfreude! How you have nurtured me in my convalescence. (Ok, I'm just being dramatic, but I do like to see mean people get their come-upance!) I just randomly happened upon a reality teevee recap and happened to see one of my old bosses on "The Bachelorette," throwing a hissyfit about the same things that used to drive him nutsy when we worked together. Oh, Robert, I'm sorry I tried to call you "Bobert" once, but at least you didn't throw something at me when I tried to give you a nickname: http://primetime.tv.yahoo.com/ The Monday recap for "The Bachelorette" Check out at 1:14.

And lest you think I'm cruel and heartless, let me share with you my own foray into reality television:

Check me out at 31 seconds and at 1:24. I may have appeared undignified on National Television, but at least I got $5,000 out of it! (And I didn't weep salty, salty tears for my ex-employees to see and mock!)

"Your mom busted in and said, "What's that noise?" Aw, mom you're just jealous it's the Beastie Boys!"

2008-05-30T11:07:00.000-07:00

I am a very patient person. I am one to say, "hate is such a strong word." I usually use "disappointed" or "don't care for."

I HATE MEDICAL BUREAUCRACY! DO NOT WANT!

I just got a call from the insurance company that doles out Lupron shots. They were confirming my date of birth and my co-pay. They'll ship out my shot in the next couple of days. What the heck, yo? The Dr.'s office ordered it May 20th. Now, it's not like I'm really eager to go into an early menopause, but I'd like to get this whole thing over and done with. The longer insurance companies quibble with each other the longer I have to wait to get well. poop.

"cause lately I've been thinking of combustion as a welcome vacation from the burdens of the planet Earth."

2008-05-27T18:11:00.000-07:00

Hiya kids.

For those of you who don't know, all my blog post titles have been lyrics from whatever random song I have stuck in my head. Sometimes it means something; sometimes it doesn't. Eddie got some great advice once that's stuck with me for a long time: "Don't make it out to be more than what it is."

So here's the latest news with regards to my medical condition:

I'll be getting a shot of Lupron in the next couple of days. I'll be in a medically induced menopause for three months to calm my endometriosis down. In about 8 weeks, I'm going to have another Laparoscopy, this time done by Dr. Camran Nezhat. I'll be down for at least 8 weeks after that, trying to avoid giving myself a hernia.

I'm really trying to remain hopeful that this will be the last surgery. This time around has been so much harder on me mentally and emotionally. I've never been through anything like this last year and my mental resources are absolutely sapped. So if you feel like getting me a present, get me something from Lush or Vosges! (I need chocolate and pampering to build up my serotonin levels.)

I'm on edge most of the time, anxious, scared. My social filters are most certainly lacking. I say things I wouldn't normally say and act out of character. It doesn't take much to make me cry or rather it seems like everything in my life right now is really traumatic so maybe I have a good reason for bursting into tears!

Essentially, what this all means is I'm going to be out of commission for a few months. I won't be in the shop, my mobility is limited because of the chronic pain, and I'm not driving.

I greatly appreciate the e-cards, emails, and visits. Please, if you'd like to come visit me, drop me a line and we'll set up some time.

"Hey Baby, Hey Baby, Hey!"

2008-05-05T11:42:00.000-07:00

Yes, I've got "No Doubt" stuck in my head. I've been watching Dancing with the Stars online while I convalesce and someone did a mambo to "Hey Baby." Now that catchy tune has worked it's way through my tortuous ear canals and burrowed deep within my psyche. "Out Psy-pest!"

And I did say convalesce. I'm sick again. Bad sick. Surgery sick. More of the same crap that happened last year is happening again. This time, I'm not messing around. I've gone to better educated specialists who've referred me on to even better educated surgeons.

Chloe Sparkle, yarn pusher. A woman barely alive. Gentlemen, we can rebuild her. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first bionic knitter. Chloe Sparkle will be that knitter. Better than she was before. Better, stronger, faster.

I will be taking some serious time off to heal. Please, contact me while I'm out on medical leave. I may be sick, but I still love and miss you guys!

Find me on Ravelry: ChloeSparkle

If you've got gmail, chat me up: chloe.sparkle

Send me animated e-cards: chloe dot sparkle at gmail dot com

"I'm a be a J-U-DOUBLEG-A-L-O, we got a raw deal, I'm a be a J-U-DOUBLEG-A-L-O, a killin' everybody."

2007-08-30T11:45:00.000-07:00

I saw this over at Nathania's blog and I couldn't resist:

Chloe Kestermont --

[adjective]:

Extremely extreme!

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

I'm doing better; I expect to be back to work soon.

"Everybody's going to the party have a real good time. Dancing in the desert, blowing up the sunshine."

2007-08-12T09:58:00.000-07:00

Hello, peeps! I am groggy, but I am eating. I hope all post-surgery nausea has passed. I definitely feel more out of it this time that I did last time, but I'm chalking that up to a more invasive surgery. My left fallopian tube is now gone, but my right one is running clear. Apparently, I had more ovarian torsion, but this time the tubes had tangled around my ovaries and swung behind my uterus. I'm still not sure of the diagnosis, but I think endometriosis is to blame for all my recent problems. Thanks for all the love and prayers. I miss you guys. Thanks for the flowers, Audie. Irises are my favorite! The cats think the box is awesome, of course.

"I thought I could organize freedom; how Scandanavian of me."

2007-08-07T19:20:00.000-07:00

To quote Rorschach from Watchmen:

Hurm.

Here I go again. Sitting at my Allen Wrench powered desk the eve before another surgery. It's almost the same thing this time as it was the last. I've got an ovarian cyst that's twice as big as my ovary causing me a wee bit o' pain. My surgeon's going in Laproscopically at first, but they may open me up further if things need to be removed. We're taking the conservative approach, but she won't know what needs to happen until she's in there. I hate to sound like a broken record, but this has been a doozy of a year. I am very much ready for 2007 to be over. So cross your fingers for me around 12:30 PST, 8/8/07. I'll throw up a quick update to let you know my status in a few days.

"The Hero of Canton, the man they call...me!"

2007-07-10T12:33:00.000-07:00

Eddie wanted a Jayne hat that actually fit like Jayne's.
So I made this ridiculously huge hat and it works on him! I hope this can help
other big headed brown coats!

Red = C1
Orange = C2
Yellow = C3

Size US 7/4.5 mm 16" circular needles.

Gauge: 5 sts to the inch
7 rows to the inch

Ear flaps, Make 2
Using C1. cast on one st.
Row 1:K1fbf
Row 2 and all even rows: Purl all stitches.
Row 3 and subsequent odd rows: K1, M1, K to last st, M1, K1.

Repeat last two rows until there are 35 sts.
work in st st for 24 rows. Place sts on holder.

With C2, knit across ear flap sts, cast on 25, knit across
other ear flap sts, cast on 25 sts. (120 sts total)

Join in the round and work 5 rounds of 1x1 rib.

Work in st st with C2 until C2 section measures 3.25" -
including rib.

Work in st with C3 for 4.25".

Decrease rounds:
Round 1: K2tog across all sts. (60 sts)
Round 2: K2tog across all sts. (30 sts)
Round 3: K2tog across all sts. (15 sts)
Round 4: K1, K2tog across remaining sts. (8 sts)
Cut yarn and draw through remaining sts.

Use leftover yarn to make a pom pom and attach to top.

Give to your favorite Cabezon.

"A little less conversation, a little more action"

2007-05-24T11:59:00.000-07:00

Health update!

Surgery went well, even better than I had hoped. I'll be convalescing at home for the next couple weeks, so if you've got any favorite websites you spend hours on, let me know! I need entertainment. Badly.

Clearing up a little misunderstanding...

2007-05-17T17:07:00.000-07:00

This was an annonymous comment left on my blog, relating to a posting I made on September 1, 2006:

"Why was Rosie let go??? She was one of your best and friendly sales persons. She helped me with all my yarn and knitting needs and was so pleasing to work with. I really feel you have made a HUGE mistake here in letting her go. I actually heard she was fired!! Again, bad choice in my eyes... I wont be back, sorry to say. Yet somehow I feel she will find an even better door to open, with nicer people to work with."

I'm sorry, you've got the wrong person. I don't have any employees in my shop. Purlescence Yarns is only run by its three owners: Sandi, Nathania, and me. I don't know anything about the situation that inspired this comment. I'm sorry.

"Sittin' down beside my ignorance, nobody loves me like you do."

2007-04-24T23:19:00.000-07:00

The Big Update

I haven't updated in quite a while, but I had a really good reason this time. I've been extremely sick. How sick, you ask? The sickest I have ever been in my life, hospitalized sick. So sick I now have a much thicker medical history. Here's the time line/deal, skip to the last paragraph for a summary if you don't want details.

March 13, late Tuesday night: Thinking I was sick from some sushi I had eaten earlier in the day, I went to the emergency room at Valley Med. Before I left, I had thrown up a few times and begun to have intense abdominal pain. When I checked in at the ER, my blood pressure was 72/27. Even though the ER was crowded, they got me into a room and bed immediately. I three up one more time before the doctor could get to me. I had a fever of 102. They put me on morphine and anti-nauseates and assumed I had food poisoning. I "stabilized" enough for them to send me home at around 6 am.

March 14 & 15: I don't remember very well. I was downing the anti-abdominal cramping meds they gave me every two hours. It wasn't really helping. I couldn't keep any liquids down: I didn't want to eat at all. Over those two days I ate half an apple and half a packet of oatmeal. I pretty much slept for 48 hours. The fever didn't go away.

March 16: I went to see my personal physician because nothing had changed since Tuesday night. She examined me and knew it wasn't food poisoning. She strongly suggested I go over to the ER at Good Samaritan in Los Gatos. I went to their ER, and proceeded to have many tests. First off, they gave me anti-nauseates and Dilaudid. Then I had a CT scan. It was inconclusive so I had an ultrasound. The ultrasound showed abscesses on my ovaries. After the US, they gave me a full pelvic exam (the first of many.) The doctor pulled out a light up speculum and I commented, "Whee! It's Christmas for my vagina!" (Top that for inappropriate hospital comments, Molly M.) The doctor was not amused, but the nurse laughed her ass off. After several hours of exams, my personal physician came down to the ER to have me admitted to the hospital.

March 16 - 21: I was in the hospital. The first couple days, I was totally out of it. I looked absolutely horrid; my eyes were sunken in, I had massive circles under my eyes, and I had dropped a lot of weight in just a couple days so my skin was hanging off me. They had me on IV antibiotics the whole time. I was so thankful for all my visitors and the portable DVD player Nathania brought me. I did start to go a little stir crazy once I had healed enough to walk around.

March 21 Wednesday afternoon: I was released from the hospital. We went to the pharmacy to get the antibiotics I'd be on for the next two weeks.

I rested at home for the next week, then slowly started coming back to work. A week after the hospital release, I had an appointment with my doctor. That's when I got the bad news. The scarring caused by the tubo-ovarian-abscesses is going to make it very difficult for me to get pregnant. There are things that can be done, operations I can have, egg donors, invitro fertilization...it's not hopeless, it just won't be easy.

So after that first check up, I saw my doctor a couple more times because the pain hadn't gone away. The scarring is making things painful.

April 18: I went in for my follow up ultrasound. They were really nice, but I was getting a little tired of foreign object in my hoo-ha. So many people have been looking at my lady bits, I almost feel like I'm back in college.

April 24, today: I had a pelvic/papsmere with my doctor. She reviewed my ultrasound results and they weren't good. Nothing has changed much. I'm back on antibiotics and I'm going to see a specialist next week. I have three options now: wait and see, more antibiotics, or surgery. We'll see what the specialist says.

To sum up: Been really sick, thought I was getting better, but I'm not. All I can do is wait and see how this goes.

"I keep on playing our favorite song, I turn it up while you're gone"

2006-12-10T00:46:00.000-08:00

Squee! I'm published in Knitty! Thanks so much for all your comments and emails. All the support warms my cold little heart! Now show me pictures of your Twinkletoes!

(BTW, this is the full pic from which my headshot was cropped. It was taken at the CIA in North Hollywood where I opened for a friend's band by doing a fire fan performance! See below for an action shot from the show.)

"let me see you shake that @$$ and break a hip on me."

2006-12-06T11:29:00.000-08:00

Sorry, for the title; I'm listening to some gangsta.

Hey kids! I know it's been a while, but you all know, I have been wayyyy busy! This opening up a yarn shop is hard work.

So today is my birthday! Forgive me if I go a little maudlin or introspective here.

This is my last year in my twenties. (Well, technically 30 is the last year of the decade, but this is the last year I'll have a 2 in the tens place.) I feel like I'm in the right spot. For once I really like I've accomplished enough to earn my age. I've spent the morning reminiscing and reflecting on the last couple of years, which have been so full. I've had so much joy and quite a few heartaches. There has been a lot of fight going on. All the family illnesses, personal relationship troubles, and job issues have been worth it to get to my current position. I've got the best husband ever, good friends, a healthy family (KNOCK! KNOCK!) and a beautiful yarn shop. Life is good and every moment is precious and appreciated for "Gam zeh ya'avor."

Required Knitting Content:

Be sure to check out this season's Knitty. ;) Best birthday present so far!

"I just can't stop loving you."

2006-10-09T00:27:00.000-07:00

Run by blogging here. Blah, blah, blah, exhaustion, blah, blah, terribly excited, blah, blah, blah. Cant' form complete sentences! Just wanted to let my secret pal know, I got my package and thank you very much! The whole exchange was a pleasure, Miss Kirby! And look, Chen-san likes the package, too! (I TOLD YOU I WOULD TORMENT YOU WITH KITTEN PICTURES! MU-HA!)

"Weave, my mother. Weave, my child."

2006-09-27T19:41:00.000-07:00

It's official' I am now a bonafide knit-blogger. I have cats and I am knitting Clapotis. I'd like to introduce you to Chairman Kaga and Chen Kenichi. You will now be mercilessly tormented with pictures of my kittens.

"Ania si Rosas Pandan"

2006-09-06T17:58:00.000-07:00

I GOT SPOILED! Unbelievably spoiled. Check out the initial contents of my lace swap package. Everything was wrapped in sassy red tissue paper, except the yarn. The yarn came in a handmade calico bag, which is too cute for words!
The rolled up letter was a really sweet enumeration of the contents written with wit and warmth, and had the most beautiful picture of Saravati printed on it!

Look at all my goodies; Two (!) Fiddlesticks patterns, Peacock Feathers AND Flirty Ruffles, six ounces of Black Zephyr (DROOL! TOO DECADENT!) two handmade soaps (the sandalwood smells divine,) lucky no. 6 perfume(my favorite number, by the way,) Knitpicks Needles (I've been wanting to try those,) Knitpicks chart keeper (which is very classy looking and such a good idea,) some sour candies (freakishly delicious and sugarfree!) and some gorgeous purple beaded stitch markers (hands off, Emy.) Thank you so much, Tonni! You totally made my month, and it's been a pretty good month so far!

"Everybody gets high, everybody gets low, these are the days when anything goes"

2006-09-01T17:07:00.000-07:00

Howdy, y'all. So, big announcement time. First off, I am not pregnant. I promise, I will tell you when that happens!

I am changing jobs. The time has come for me to leave commuknity. I have had a wonderful year, met so many great people, and learned a lot. It wasn't an easy decision to leave, but it was the right one. I am really doing this for me and my future. My next opportunity involves a lot of growth potential. Finally, I'm becoming a woman and doing something extremely positive for myself.

I am now a local yarn store co-owner along with Nathania and Sandi. We'll be opening our own yarn store specializing in in-house designs. I am very excited about this for there is much excitement to be had! I am coming into my own and becoming the Mistress of my own Destiny!

Purlescence Yarns
586 S. Murphy Ave
Sunnyvale, Ca 94086
408-735-YARN (9276)
www.purlescenceyarns.com

See you October 14th!

"And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table"

2006-08-29T14:16:00.000-07:00

Watch this blog for a pretty big announcement, coming very shortly. Just know for right now, I am experiencing the first cold I've had in three years and I am super grumpy about it.

"You must be my lucky star 'cuz you shine on me wherever you are."

2006-08-16T23:21:00.000-07:00

One hundred things about me, in no particular order.

1. I was born in Santa Clara, Ca, on December 6th, 1977.
2. I was married October 31, 2004.
3. My first cat's name was Rube.
4. My middle name is Sparkle.
5. I actually own my car, a 2000 Hyundai Accent named Angggggus!
6. Billy Idol was my first crush.
7. I made a scrapbook devoted to said first crush.
8. My first concert was Pat Benetar.
9. My last concert was Twiztid.
10. I've been to Europe twice.
11. I love skulls, muertos, and calaveras.
12. I think pirates and ninjas are cool.
13. I love the Gamara and Mothra movies.
14. I drink way too much diet coke, at least 5 two liters a week.
15. I want to design knitting patterns for a living.
16. I got my driver's license at 16.
17. I took behind the wheel training from a guy who would nap the whole time I drove.
18. I got a 70 on my driver's test. (Hey, I took it downtown, ok!)
19. My first instrument was piano; I only studied for about 3 months, but in that time I learned to read music.
20. My second instrument was clarinet. I played that for four years.
21. I sang in different choirs for 8 years straight, from Freshman year in high school to senior in college.
22. I got my degree in Music, vocal performance.
23. My senior recital consisted mainly of Schubert Goethe Lieder and John Jacob Niles artsongs.
24. I had my first real kiss at 17.
25. I have a scar on my upper lip from trying to place a cat on top of a speaker cabinet. The cat used his back leg to get his balance and I ended up needing 3 stitches.
26. I have one tattoo, on my upper back. It's Sarasvati, and she protects me from infatuation.
27. I was in a motorcycle accident when I was ten. I had the scars for a long time. Now, I can hardly see them
28. I've got a pretty decent scar on my leg from trying to stand on a fish tank and crashing right through it.
29. I used to sleep in a 6 and half foot high bunk bed. It was hand made by my carpenter neighbor.
30. My first computer was an Atari 800.
31. I first dyed my hair as a sophomore in high school. Red.
32. I studied dance for all four years of high school
33. I was way into musical theater as well. My first solo was "Send in the Clowns."
34. I've met most of the Psychopathic family.
35. I've met Tori Amos.
36. "To Kill a Mockingbird" is one of my favorite books. All you have to do is say, "Hey Boo," to me and I'll start bawling.
37. Red is my all time favorite color. Really pure reds.
38. I like Pinot Noir.
39. "Evil Dead 2, the sequel to the ultimate experience in grueling terror," is on of my all time favorite movies.
40. "Pet Sounds" is one of my top ten albums.
41. I got married in a red wedding dress.
42. I have a soft spot for vampire novels.
43. My yarn stash isn't really that big.
44. Pastels look awful on me.
45. I love blue glass.
46. Gardenia and Nag Champa are two of my favorite smells.
47. I can eat fire.
48. My husband and I own a wall sculpture call "Mr. Poopy, the octopus."
49. Debbie New and Barbara Walker are my knitting heros.
50. "Preacher" is on of my favorite comics.
51. Batman is my favorite superhero.
52. My first lunchbox had Carebears on it.
53. I like Decepticons better than Autobots. Soundwave rules!
54. I watched a lot of She-Ra and He-Man growing up. What ridiculous names. He-man, geesh.
55. I never owned a Strawberry Shortcake nor a Rainbow Brite.
56. I want to visit India.
57. I'm pretty vain. Flattering my vanity will get you everywhere.
58. I dig costume jewelry.
59. "The Faberge Egg" coffee table book holds endless hours of fascination for me.
60. The "Pinkerton" books were a big part of my childhood.
61. I can be still and quiet for very long periods of time.
62. I have a serious weakness for tall boys with side burns and a "little more to love."
63. Conan O'Brien was my teenage crush. From 16 to at least 20 years old.
64. I'm currently taking traffic school online.
65. I volunteered at the suicide and Crisis hotline of Santa Clara County for three years.
66. I'm pretty good at making friendship bracelets.
67. I love Mortal Combat, the movie and the video game.
68. I play World of Warcraft.
69. I play Texas Hold 'em.
70. Chinese art really appeals to me.
71. Stained glass makes me happy.
72. My first modem was 4800 baud.
73. I had an obsession with Marilyn Monroe for a long time. I had posters of her all over my room.
74. I made a weak attempt at being rockabilly. I did rock me some Bettie Paige bangs, though.
75. I am woman, hear me roar.
76. I've seen "The Thing!" on highway 10.
77. I like platform shoes and boots. I always wanted to be very tall.
78. The Cure is probably one of the very few "80's bands" I obsessed over.
79. I've got greenish brown eyes. You have to look very close to see the green, so they mostly just look brown.
80. I had awful acne as a teenager.
81. Lace knitting makes me happy!
82. Movies are a great passion for my husband and me.
83. I think Will Ferrell is kind of attractive. It must be that whole sideburns/tall thing.
84. I like long, flowy skirts and halter tops.
85. I wish I took more pictures.
86. I love my family to pieces and I treasure the relationship we all have now, as adults.
87. I want to be a 50's pin-up girl.
88. I've done "Burlesque." In fact, I've appeared in a book on the new movement.
89. I'm fairly shy until you get to know me.
90. My favorite chocolate is "Mayan Quest" by Schura's.
91. Smarties are my favorite candy.
92. I have a pet snake named "Milton." You know, Paradise Lost...
93. I've seen Michaelangelo's David and the Sistene Chapel in person.
94. I've been to Berlin's Love Parade.
95. Neil Gaimen is one of my favorite authors.
96. I always wanted green eyes.
97. I want to get my maiden name tattooed across my knuckles. D-Y-D-O.
98. Handpainted yarns are the way to go.
99. I feel quite lucky to have my life.
100. Richard Scarey's counting books also held endless hours of entertainment for me.

Woo. Did you read all that?

"Sigh no more ladies"

2006-08-11T19:24:00.000-07:00

My secret pal has struck again! I've have been spoiled with the best candy in the world, smarties, a "clue" magnet from Maryland, super cheeky retro style cocktail napkins (for cosmos of course!) two super funkalicious balls of a luxuriously soft red yarn made in Turkey, and a gummy lunch (see the other photo for details, too cute!) I think this yarn wants to be a hat, definitely with ear flaps. It's got a lot of elasticity in it, though, so it make some super cozy slippers. Hooray presents! Thank you so much, secret pal!

"If you strip away the myth from the man you will see where we all soon will be"

2006-08-05T09:45:00.000-07:00

I yoinked this from the SP8 hostess' page.

1) What is your favorite season of the year?

Autumn. The weather is just right out here in San Hoser, warm, not too hot, cool enough to knit heavier things. It also is the season of my birthday and my wedding anniversary which fall on my favorite holiday, Halloween.

2) Where is your favorite vacation spot?

I really love Berlin. The city has so been through so much in the last century and you can feel that as you walk through the streets. On of my favorite memories is dancing at all hours during the Love Parade underneath the ruins of Kaiser Wilhelm GedÃ¤chtniskirche.

3) If you could visit any place in the world, where would it be?

I really want to visit India. I've always beenfascinatedd with her art and culture. Plus, now that there are so many freshly transplanted Indians in the bay area, I'd like toexperiencee their homeland.

4) If you could pick any job, and be paid well, what would it be?

I'd get paid fabulously to be a house designer for a superior yarn company.

5) If you were going on vacation for 1 week, and had to take ONLY one project with you, what would it be?

Depending on the destination. Cruise ship type stuff: lace shawl. Somewhere much more exciting: believe it or not, probably nothing. I'd be too busy!

6) If you won a shopping spree to your favorite Yarn shop, what would you get?

Quiviut. Cashmere. All the luxury fibers I really can't afford. I'd probably also run through the lace patterns and definitely snag a copy of "A Gathering of Lace."

"When I am king, you will be first against the wall."

2006-07-25T22:18:00.000-07:00

Finished object report:

The loverly Icarus Shawl from the most recent Interweave Knits. I used Zephyr (50% merino, 50% silk) by Jaggerspun in Cinnabar. I am extremely impressed with yarn; boy howdy, can it take a beating. I aggressively, nay, fiercely blocked this puppy. The results are superb, a drapey, ephemerally soft garment with a hint of shine. Tre jolie!

"Sono andati? Fingevo di dormire perché volli con te sola restare. Ho tante cose che ti voglio dire, o una sola, ma grande come il mare,"

2006-06-26T19:53:00.000-07:00

I just ate a whole bag of Poppycock and didn't giggle once. I must be maturing.

"The suburbs they are sleeping, But he's dressing up tonight, She likes a man in uniform, he likes to wear it tight."

2006-06-11T22:42:00.000-07:00

Look!

I got secret pal goodness! Included in my lovely packge were sour patch kids (see photo bellow of Eddie plundering the candy,) some other sour candy which features a "real baby bottle nipple" (yes, it said nipple ) a stitch marker with a beautiful red and black glass bead, a cute sheepy card, and some gorgeous hand dyed fingering weight yarn.

"You take me for a walk, under the sycamore trees, the dark trees that blow, baby, in the dark trees that blow"

2006-05-08T19:16:00.000-07:00

As said by the One-Armed Man: "In the darkness of future past, the magician longs to see. One chance outs between two worlds... fire, walk with me."

I got my sockapalooza socks and they are Fire on the Mountain, Socks that Rock by Blue Moon Fibers! Now, this is terribly cool and an awesome coincidence because I was just eyeing and envying Miss Melodie's sock yarn in the very same color way. But not only did I get awesome socks that fit perfectly (they even hug my arch,) I got a whole batch of goodies from my dear sockpal, Annette (a California native now living in North Carolina who possesses a Doctorate in Biology! My socks were made by a smartie!) My socks were paired in a super cute sock label featuring the sockapalooza logo, too clever. The package also contained absolutely beautiful handmade stitch markers (which you can see in close up on her blog,) the rest of the fire on the mountain (YES! I'll make matching cuffs!) a postcard from Duke, AND two balls of silly cute, funk-a-licious Regia sock yarn so I can make myself a pair of socks! Too awesome! I am totally spoiled! One detail I adore on these socks is the cuff is a zig zag caused by the pattern on the actual socks. Thank you, Annette! So Happy! Yatta!

"change in the air, and they'll hide everywhere, no one knows who's in control

2006-05-06T19:29:00.000-07:00

Finished object report and some other lovely, lovely news.

My sockpal got her socks and made me feel like a total superhero with her enthusiasm! Yay Jenny! Follow this link to see her wearing them.

The pattern is "ruffle skirted tutu" from Filatura Di Crossa's "baby...bebe...bambini." The yarn is artyarns Super Merino in colorway 130.

Final thoughts: yummy! Artyarns must be made to run over addi turbos and create an extremely pleasing sensation! The pattern was pretty simple; there was one error, which could have been avoided had I compared the schematic to the written instructions. I hope my friends love it as much as I do. Congrats to Ryan and Mona on their brand new baby girl!

But what I'm really proud of on this item is something no one but knitters will ever care about.....Look at my seaming and fear me!!!

"she's like the wind through my tree, she rides the next close to me"

2006-05-04T12:24:00.000-07:00

As a courtesy to my future secret pal, here are my answers to the questionnaire. Everyone else, enjoy the rare sharing moment.

1. What is/are your favorite yarn/s to knit with? What fibers do you absolutely *not* like?
My favorite yarns change almost every time I pick up a new project. Currently, I love RYC 4 ply Cashsoft, but I am also in love with Artyarns Supermerino. Handpainted yarns turn my crank. The only fibers I absolutely do not like are plastic-y acrylic (micro fibers and polymides are fine) and angora (because I am allergic to bunnies.)

2. What do you use to store your needles/hooks in?
I use two Lantern Moon needle cases, both in coordinating orange, one for my single points and circulars and one for my double pointeds.

3. How long have you been knitting? Would you consider your skill level to be beginner, intermediate or advanced?
I'd say I'm intermediate. I've been knitting for over three years now (nearly constantly.) I've had experience with intarsia, moebius knitting, socks, sweaters, cables, scribble lace, lace, entrelac, felting, tiny needles, and very large needles. I haven't done any Iris Scherer style modular knitting nor any fair isle on a large scale. But I'm always open to trying new things and growing.

4. Do you have an Amazon or other online wish list?
Nope, but maybe I should start one.

5. What's your favorite scent? (for candles, bath products etc.)
I love gardenia and sweetpea. I like clean, single note scents.

6. Do you have a sweet tooth? Favorite candy?
Boy, do I ever. I totally dig on smarties. I like hyper sugary, sour stuff such as sweet tarts, lik-a-maid, sour patch kids, and crybabies. I'm drooling right now making this list.

7. What other crafts or Do-It-Yourself things do you like to do? Do you spin?
I only spin after doing whippets. Craft wise, I like to renovate furniture, play with fimo, bead, make shrinky dinks, sew, and dye my hair.

8. What kind of music do you like? Can your computer/stereo play MP3s? (if your buddy wants to make you a CD)
I am mp3 compatible. As far as music, whew. Okay, I was a music major in college; I have a bachelor of arts in music, vocal performance. My tastes are so varied there's no real point in listing them all. I pretty much like anything done with heart, even if it's slightly out of tune. So that being said, here's the short list of bands I like: Twiztid, The Cure, Muse, Queens of the Stone Age, Queen, Smokey Robinson, The White Stripes, Jeff Buckley, Monserat Caballe, Alice Cooper, Etta James, Tom Jones, Insane Clown Posse, Tori Amos, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, Bjork, Lamb, Blaze, Beck, Switchblade Symphony, k.d. lang, Nikka Costa, Christina Aguilerra, NOFX, Outkast, The reverend Horton Heat, PJ Harvey, Billy Idol, Mindless Self Indulgence, Abba, Dark Lotus, Eazy-E, Buddy Holly, and many, many, more.

9. What's your favorite color? Or--do you have a color family/season/palette you prefer? Any colors you just can't stand?
Red is my favorite color. I like it in combination with Black or Army Green. I love striking colors, jewel tones. I'm pretty pale and I have a lot of pink in my skin so most pinks don't sit well with me, and pastels tend to not work, either.

10. What is your family situation? Do you have any pets?
I am married, no kids, one house mate. We've got two snakes, a ball python and an African sand boa. We really want a kitty but our lease doesn't allow furry pets.

11. Do you wear scarves, hats, mittens or ponchos?
I wear scarves and hats; it's too warm for mittens out here. I never wear ponchos, unless it's to amuse my co-workers with how bad the thing looks on me.

12. What is/are your favorite item/s to knit?
I like projects that can be completed in about a week. So, I dig knitting gauntlets, hats, and scarf-ish things.

13. What are you knitting right now?
A shawl, a pair of socks, a clapotis (yes I gave in,) and a baby sweater that needs some snaps.
14. Do you like to receive handmade gifts?
I prefer it! I love it when somebody gives me something they made with their own hands, while thinking of me, and hoping I'll appreciate it.

15. Do you prefer straight or circular needles? Bamboo, aluminum, plastic?
Circular needles are my main preference; I love me some addi turbos. For double pointeds, I like Crystal Palace Bamboo. I haven't really given plastic a chance.

16. Do you own a yarn winder and/or swift?
I work in a yarn store, so I have access to both.

17. How did you learn to knit?
See my post from 11/18/2005 for the details.
18. How old is your oldest UFO?
It's Birch from October of 2005. Not that old, eh?

19. What is your favorite holiday?
Halloween, definitely. It's my wedding anniversary and the best day of the year.

20. Is there anything that you collect?
I collect vintage knitting patterns and costume jewelry.

21. Any books, yarns, needles or patterns out there you are dying to get your hands on? What knitting magazine subscriptions do you have?
Books and magazines I do not need. Yarn, however...anything we don't carry at commuknity! In particular, lightweight socks that rock by Blue Moon Fiber Arts in Ruby Slippers.

22. Are there any new techniques you'd like to learn?
Fair Isle, hands down. I'd like to learn two socks on a magic loop, too. I think Fiber Trends has a booklet on it...

23. Are you a sock knitter? What are your foot measurements?
I like to knit socks. My feet are about nine and a half inches long, about eight inches around the ball of my foot. My ankles are about eight inches around.

24. When is your birthday? (mm/dd)
December 6, 1977. I'm a Sagittarius born in the year of the serpent, so I'm doubly vain!

"Cuz I go loco and apply the chokehold"

2006-05-01T21:44:00.000-07:00

Whee! Just in time! I finished my sockapalooza socks with seconds to spare. The pattern is Fiber Trends' Walking away socks. The yarn is Claudia's Handpainted in Passionfruit. Both are, coincidently, available at commuknity! The yarn was sooo yummy and the pattern was so fun that I might just have to buy myself (or make?) some clogs and whip up a few pairs of these babies for me!

"Kiss today goodbye, and point me towards tomorrow"

2006-04-16T23:57:00.000-07:00

Things I learned while knitting these socks:
1. People tremble in fear at the size of my husband's feet.
2. Toe up socks are the way to go when you're knitting on the fly for someone with huge feet.
3. I can rip out three inches of already bound off sock and fix ankle decreases!
4. One ball of Lana Grossa sock yarn is just enough for a pair of socks for a large man.
5. I tremble in fear at the the size of my husband's feet.

I read in the yarn harlot's first book that a pair of socks averages 20,000 stitches. I must do it for love....

Or to avoid being squished!

"It's the multpile man and I'm deuce in line, With a gauge to your dome about to free your mind"

2006-03-08T09:46:00.000-08:00

What Kind of Knitter Are You?

You appear to be a Knitting Goddess. You are constantly giving and are unconcerned with reward, you simply want others to love knitting as much as you do. If someone wants to knit miles of novelty yarns, you are there for them. If someone wants to learn short row shaping, you can help. There are no taboos in knitting, only opportunities to grow. Everyone should have friend like you around if they want to learn to knit, and there's a good chance that your passion has rubbed off on a few others.http://marniemaclean.com
Take this quiz!

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I have to say, this pleases me. Especially after the day I had at the store today. People were trying to adopt me into their families!

"Hello, I'm sorry I lost myself, I think I thought you were someone else."

2006-03-01T15:28:00.000-08:00

I control the weather.

"It's some other man, and they're hand in hand, and they look so happy, you don't understand..."

2006-02-28T17:24:00.000-08:00

I am a winner. I finished my Olympic sweater with hours to spare. I must say, this is my best seaming job ever. The real challenge for me was to not rush it and actually line all the stitches up in their proper places. I decided not to add the sash because the sweater was a bit roomy (even though my gauge was smaller than stated) and a empire style belt just made the whole thing very unappealing to me. Pictures will follow. In the mean time, enjoy my flashy medal, created by Franklin..

In other news, I'm teaching a top down raglan sweater class, 3/4 & 3/11, 3-6PM, at commuknity. Come sign up so I'm not teaching the dustmites how to create an awesomely fitting sweater custom fit to your measurements.

And just one more aside...
I saw an ad on the side of a bus for "Disney on Ice presents Finding Nemo." My question is how do fish ice skate if they don't have feet?

"maybe I'm the afterglow 'cause I'm with the band, you know."

2006-02-09T22:12:00.000-08:00

hee hee

Maybe it's the Tylenol PM....

I was reading someone else's blog and I misread "Blogless" as "Blogress," as in, the mother Blogress is fierce in her devotion to her cubs.

I'm going to bed now.

"We're only making plans for Nigel. We only want what's best for him."

2006-02-09T21:49:00.000-08:00

I have joined my first knit goods exchange, the sockapalooza! My sock pall shall be receiving a pair of socks made from Claudia's Handpainted Yarns in Passionfruit:

She said her favorite colors were pink and brown, so I hope these will please. Now, I need to find a pattern, something with a lot of movement. Any suggestions?

"Every little thing she does is magic"

2006-02-09T00:46:00.000-08:00

The Family that watches Firefly together...

wears Jayne hats together.

Poor hubby was feeling ill the other day so I thought I'd cheer him up with a handknit surprise. We'd started watching Firefly on DVD after loving Serenity so much. I knew of the mysterious Jayne hat, but we hadn't gotten to the episode which featured it. I figured we'd hit it that night because we were down to one disk. So I placed Eddie's gift in a leftover x-mas gift box, and waited for the hat to appear on screen. Lucky for me, it was within the first five minutes of the first episode. Jayne receives a package from his mom; I hopped up from my chair and gave the gift box to Eddie and told him, "Open it at the same time Jayne opens the present from his mom." He obliged and gave me the most priceless, wonderful look. "How did you know that was going to happen?" was his stunned reaction. Later, in telling the story to our housemate, he said, "It was magical." And that, dear friends, is a good reason to knit.

"I had a dream that you danced just like Fred Astaire"

2006-02-05T00:17:00.000-08:00

It was time for a diet. I needed to lose a few ounces. Cut away the fluff and get to the lean. By fluff, I mean acrylic, fun furs, and anything that had given me undue attitude over the past few years.

These are my sorted piles; you'll get a special prize from me if you can name all the fiber categories into which I sorted my yarn. The prize: glory, baby, glory...And all my redheart and lion brand stuff.

I also found all these needles and tools I'd been searching for (my size 6 addi natura 24" circulars still elude me!)

Check out the reorganized stash closet. Pretty swanky, eh?

"I'll be your number one with a bullet, a loaded God complex, cock it and pull it."

2006-01-27T15:19:00.000-08:00

I am joing the knit olympics! I'll be knitting Belle Epoque for Team Angstylvania! I figure, joing the Angstylvanians gives me an out if I don't actually finish.

"I don't care what they say anymore, this is my life"

2006-01-23T23:05:00.000-08:00

So, uh, hi!

The most wonderful, heartwarming thing happened to me over the last couple days. A young girl, named Olivia, and her mother came into the store yesterday, asking if we had any knitters who could do a little knit repair. The object in need of some care was a kitten doll, created by the Great Grandmother (who is no longer with us) of the young lady. The poor little kitten had lost her mittens and was in dire need of a replacement set (and I figured a new matching scarf as well.) There was great sentimental value attached to this kitten but Olivia was brave and trusted her precious kitty to my care for the night so I could fit her with a snappy new set of handwarmers. I glady obliged and whipped up some knitterly love.

Today, Olivia and her mother came into the store to pick up the kitten and presented me with this:

I swear, I got a little tear eyed and overwelmed. I think I got more out of this exchange than Olivia did.

Three Little Kittens
Three little kittens,
They lost their mittens,
And they began to cry,
Oh mother dear,
We sadly fear,
That we have lost our mittens.

What! Lost your mittens,
You naughty kittens!
Then you shall have no pie.
Mee-ow, mee-ow, mee-ow,
No, you shall have no pie.

The three little kittens,
They found their mittens,
And they began to cry,
Oh, mother dear,
See here, see here,
We have found our mittens.

What! Found your mittens,
You silly kittens!
Then you shall have some pie.
Purr-r, purr-r, purr-r,
Oh, let us have some pie.

The three little kittens,
Put on their mittens,
And soon ate up the pie;

Oh, mother dear,
We greatly fear,
That we have soiled our mittens.

What! Soiled your mittens,
You naughty kittens!
Then they began to sigh,
Mee-ow, mee-ow, mee-ow.
Then they began to sigh.

The three little kittens,
They washed their mittens,
And hung them out to dry;
Oh mother dear,

Look here, look here,
We have washed our mittens.
What! Washed your mittens,
You're good little kittens .
But I smell a mouse close by!
Hush! Hush! Hush!
I smell a mouse close by

"Better make your reservations for next year's anarchy camp"

2006-01-11T21:17:00.000-08:00

I haven't quite gotten used to this blogging on a regular basis thing. That's not true; I haven't at all gotten used to this blogging on a regular basis thing. I tend to be one of those people who don't volunteer information about themselves; I wait for questions. Hence, my hesitance to blog and my tendency toward reticence. So forgive me, dear bloggland.

Check out my Christmas knitting success:

I knit these for a friend of my husband's to give to his nieces. They were declared "most favorite presents," even over the gameboy and the bicycle, and have ensured Paulie's postition as "favorite uncle" FOREVER!

This pattern is now available at Commuknity or you can buy it directly from me. My alien hats will take over the world. muhahaha.

"I'll do your laundry, massage your soul..."

2005-12-06T12:24:00.000-08:00

Attack of the "Alien Hat," (as it has been named by my darling Eddie.)

Here's my wonderful, patient husband, mollifying me with a photo of his new hat, knit in Rowan Spray. In this photo you will also notice a lovely scarf made of Lion Brand Kitchen Cotton (all you yarn snobs out there, give it a chance!) Eddie loves his handknits. I am extremely pleased to have a husband who asks questions about and appreciates my knitting, but has no interest in knitting himself, so there is no danger of me coming home and finding him knee deep in my stash, choosing my Lorna's Laces for this.

"Just stand on your feet; If you fall, then have courage to walk again."

2005-11-26T09:18:00.000-08:00

May I present to you:

It doesn't have a name yet...suggestions? It's made out of Rowan Spray, in Mellow. Of course, I think the color should be called Sweeny Todd. My husband loves the hat and wants his own.

When he got a look at the color though...he had this to say, "It looks like this really beautiful yarn that someone bled all over." The perfect accessory to your crime spree.

"You're a bad little chick and that's the word on the street, You're the kind of girl I'd like to meet."

2005-11-18T23:35:00.000-08:00

One from the archives....

This is the first scarf I ever made. Yes, I had to weave in all those ends. Yes, it is made out of Red Heart Super Saver. And yes, I used to have Bettie Page bangs. See also...

(That's a side by side for all you rockabilly impaired persons out there.)

But the good things about this scarf:
I made it to show my spirit for my little brother's homecoming game.
It got me into knitting on a regular basis, and you know where that took me.

I decided to start knitting a few years ago after a couple unsuccessful attempts in my childhood. My mom is an awesome knitter, an intarsia queen. Her copy of glorious Knits is completely broken, with pages falling everywhere. She taught me the basics when I was wee, but it just didn't catch with me. But to me, knitting=mom. (I love my mom to pieces, so that's a good thing. I have no problem turning into my mother; I should be so lucky.) So, a few years ago, when I had moved to LA, I was quite homesick. My roommate was knitting an afghan and the sound of her aluminum needles clicking together reminded me of my mom. The sound was so comforting, it inspired me to take up a pair of needles on my own. This time, it was right for me; everything clicked. As I knit away the 80 degree winter, I was spiritually with my family with every beenie and scarf I made.

2005-10-17T20:41:00.000-07:00

My husband made this for me!

"She may not walk the walk, and she may not like to talk, but boy she sure knows how to rock; she's nubs!"

2005-10-16T22:19:00.000-07:00

I am so woooo'ed out.

I went to a WWE house show with my mom tonight; boy howdy, can that girl party. We had a fabulous time cheering all our favorite wrestlers. I was very excited to see Trish Stratus back in action; my mom's baby Kane, also is back, and in fine form. (Though he was wrestling this guy, so it was kind of a "battle of the ugly bald heads" and really should have been a "paper bag over the head" match.) It was "RAW," so I didn't get to see my favorites from "Smackdown," but there was plenty of man-beast action to go around.

I didn't take any pictures tonight, but here's a couple of pics from past events:

This is The Rock's ass. Anytime there's a "something on a pole match," it's just an excuse to "pants" someone. Thankfully, it was the Rock and not The Big Bossman.

Here Lee and I are auditioning for the WWF at our second Wresltmania.

It has a good beat and you can dance to it.

2005-10-08T19:57:00.000-07:00

I have new pictures!

I have finished my self-designed hoodlette. After much deliberation, I've decided to call it Homecoming 'cuz it's fall colored and sporty. You know, October, cheerleaders, that kind of thing. I made it out of this with the sleeves, hood, and picked up stitches out of the primarily gold colorway with little bits of green and red and the body out of the mostly green colorway. I liked the effect of the yarn a great deal-i-o. It did pill a little, but it wasn't anything a close shave with a disposable razor couldn't cure (thanks for the tip mom!)

My Katrina rib is coming along quite nicely. I may be able to finish it tonight. Get the pattern on Cookie's blog, or at Commuknity.

Kisses.

2005-10-08T19:52:00.000-07:00

Sass from the front

2005-10-08T19:51:00.000-07:00

Sass from the back

"You don't wanna see me in my b boy stance."

2005-09-30T11:56:00.000-07:00

My firewire is missing, so there will be no new pictures until I can find it. But I've got old pictures with new information, so that counts for something, doesn't it?

The Kitty Hat and its Legacy

One day, I made my friend an attempt at a kitty hat. It was cute, but simple, a stockinette cap with a rolled brim and sewn on ears. I searched the web for a better alternative and came up with this.

This pattern so excited me that I ran down to my LYS and procured a ball of grey and a ball of pink mohair-ish yarn. I whipped up a hat for myself within a couple days, (it was my first experience knitting in the round.) It was the cutest thing I had ever knit, up to that point.

I started wearing my hat on a fairly regular basis and received many requests from friends for their very own. Now, the parade of the pictures!

This is my brother, Lee. He rocks. He wanted an anime style kitty hat. In most of his pictures, he is nearly naked except for a hat. This is the rule, not the exception.

This is Sarah's ktty hat. She wanted her school colors; I threw in the spiral. She says people are always asking her wear they can buy one. That makes me happy on the inside.

Ryan specially requested a hot pink and black one. He's about six foot four and has nothing to prove. He's my kind of guy. He likes to wear it while he paintballs, thus this kitty hat has been featured in several paintball enthusiast publications. Knitting is hardcore!

Todd wanted a mohawk on his. Glady, I obliged. Damn punk never wears it.

I made this hat about two years ago for a friend I very rarely see.
I measured his extra large noggin and promised him I would make him his very own Batman hat, in the style of the ever swingin' Mr. West's Batman. I held onto this hat for two years until finally, I saw him last Saturday. When I gave it to him, his eyes lit up and he exclaimed, "My very own Batman hat! That's the Sh!t; you're the sh!t" I get really happy when Jaime tells me I'm the sh!t.

Thus concludes our walk through my kitty hat legacy. There have been others (but I don't have pics); there will likely be more. Feel free to drop a comment with your special request.

Sandy Sashimi Sundries

2005-09-21T13:10:00.000-07:00

So right now, you may be thinking, "why the Hundredth Monkey, Chloe?" Well, I'll tell you dear reader...

The Hundredth Monkey

by Ken Keyes, Jr.

The Japanese monkey, Macaca fuscata, had been observed in the wild for a period of over 30 years.

In 1952, on the island of Koshima, scientists were providing monkeys with sweet potatoes dropped in the sand. The monkeys liked the taste of the raw sweet potatoes, but they found the dirt unpleasant.

An 18-month-old female named Imo found she could solve the problem by washing the potatoes in a nearby stream. She taught this trick to her mother. Her playmates also learned this new way and they taught their mothers too.

This cultural innovation was gradually picked up by various monkeys before the eyes of the scientists.

Between 1952 and 1958 all the young monkeys learned to wash the sandy sweet potatoes to make them more palatable.

Only the adults who imitated their children learned this social improvement. Other adults kept eating the dirty sweet potatoes.

Then something startling took place. In the autumn of 1958, a certain number of Koshima monkeys were washing sweet potatoes -- the exact number is not known.

Let us suppose that when the sun rose one morning there were 99 monkeys on Koshima Island who had learned to wash their sweet potatoes.

Let's further suppose that later that morning, the hundredth monkey learned to wash potatoes.

THEN IT HAPPENED!

By that evening almost everyone in the tribe was washing sweet potatoes before eating them.

The added energy of this hundredth monkey somehow created an ideological breakthrough!

But notice.

A most surprising thing observed by these scientists was that the habit of washing sweet potatoes then jumped over the sea --

Colonies of monkeys on other islands and the mainland troop of monkeys at Takasakiyama began washing their sweet potatoes.

Thus, when a certain critical number achieves an awareness, this new awareness may be communicated from mind to mind.

Although the exact number may vary, this Hundredth Monkey Phenomenon means that when only a limited number of people know of a new way, it may remain the conscious property of these people.

But there is a point at which if only one more person tunes-in to a new awareness, a field is strengthened so that this awareness is picked up by almost everyone!

(from the book "The Hundredth Monkey" by Ken Keyes, Jr. The book is not copyrighted and the material may be reproduced in whole or in part. You can look at the whole book also.)

Isn't that neat? (It may not be totally true, but it does represent a society wide paradigm shift, and that's awesome, too.)

"So, how does this relate to you, Chloe, but more importantly, how does it relate to knitting? And why do you look like Sporty Spice in that picture?" you continue to query.

I like to think I'm a creative individual, that I can come up with cool concepts and novel ideas on a whim. But deep in my heart, I know that there is nothing new under the sun. Anything I can invent, 99 monkeys before me have invented.

For example, my incident with the one skein wonder, a pattern published by Glampyre Knits. I thought myself very clever when I decided to knit a raglan shrug from the top down, making up my pattern as I went along. I spotted one of my co-workers knitting something very similar to what I was knitting and asked, "Hey Rebecca, what's that?" She proceeded to show me the pattern for the one skein wonder, which was almost exactly what I was making up. I showed her my work and cemented my fate as the Hundredth Monkey.

This doesn't not make me bitter, nor angry. In fact, I find it quite delightful. It's Zeitgeist; I'm tapped into the collective unconscious, baby. It's a nice reminder of the wonders of knitting, the ideas we can share, and the beauty we can create.

Welcome to the brain of the Hundredth Monkey

2005-09-12T11:01:00.000-07:00

So I've given in to the intense pressure at work and decided to start my own blog. Now when Nathania or Kate post about my yarn related antics, they can give me a shout out. Can I get a woo woo?

The most essential thing you need to know about me is that my life is ruled by whimsy and irony.